The Ted Chain

Ted's music efforts over the years fall under the moniker "The Ted Chain". It's like a long, interconnected series of bizarre events.

Note to self: Move all this to bandcamp.

Archdiocese

Wenceslas (click to play, right-click to save)

Archdiocese is the peak of Ted's sad attempt at what might loosely be called "talent". Everything is Ted except for the only redeeming part: Chad's incredibly ballsy vocal track.

More Archdiocese...

Absolute Value

Voices (click to play, right-click to save)

Absolute Value hold the distinction of being the top-rated Ted Chain band, according to the Ted Chain Top 40 for 1997. These guys are really great. You can tell Ted wasn't involved. Actually, Ted did record this, so it's a wonder you can hear them at all.

More Absolute Value...

Ted

Bass in Space (click to play, right-click to save)

"Bass In Space" is Ted's song about a bassist. The original two-bar bass line was penned for the Bath-key Bangers by J.J.Jammer. Ted took the bass line, and ran with it, adding drums, guitar, and a rap-inspired set of lyrics. The result is this little jazz number featuring Ted on everything including, unfortunately, the "singing". Hold on to your ears, and forget everything you know about tuning...

Fart Burp Twik (click to play, right-click to save)

Fart Burp Twik is an intimate examination of the relationship between 80's low-budget science fiction and the realities of the bedroom. This was the original inspiration for the ill-fated "Buck Rogers Sexperience" project.

More Sounds

Click on the buttons to listen, or right-click to save. Band page link is to the right of each button.

Kill Yourself Big Toe

Voyage To Uranus Buttocks II

Burn in Hell Last Supper

Bar-B-Q Riverside Connection

Dazed Elephant JJJammers

Touch My Oatmeal (clip) Rancid Oatmeal

Other Junk

Interviews
Bands
Ted Team Studios
Press Releases
History
Broken Life Festival

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This website is a work of fiction. All of the characters portrayed in this website are fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright © 2001-2016, Ted

Copyright © 2001-2016, The Ted Chain